Exciting Stuff

So I have found my enthusiasm, The Fog has lifted and the Michelle Bridges Blanket is back where I am feeling warm and cosy!!!

However I was still picking away after dinner at homemade biscuits thinking (it's OK Leigh 1 wont hurt) WRONG! "This is how it starts all over again" picking, pies, no preparation the 80+ kg again. No Way.

So I started the Pre Season Tasks again. I was in the frame of mind that I could just gloss over them because I had already been there done that and new what it was all about so that would save time..WRONG AGAIN! 

I am getting good at this almost feels like a game of Monopoly Do not pass go do not collect $200.

I sat down and I went through each task regardless of whether I had half arsed done them or not and re did all 6. And you would never guess, I learnt something new:
- I am rater good at negative self talk.
- I need to be prepared as I am good at Glossing over things (lol), 
-And that my excuses have changed from oh its cold (though I still have used that recently) to more complex excuses!

So this is what I am committing to me:
I want this for me;
I am achieving it;
I am being the best venison of myself;
I am a Woman of my word;

 And the first Item on my list of to do is to win Gold @ the National Tae Kwon Do Champs this weekend! Wish me Luck

 

Do we mourn our Weight Loss???


Well I am sure I did, my mind has been in sabotage mode since the last week of Round 1. I have eaten snacks that I really didn't need telling myself it's ok, Exercised 5 x not 6 a week and haven't been generally all that motivated, more deflated!

I have kept to my 1200 Cal's even though it may have been something not necessary and I have still picked myself up and exercised somewhat; But it was like I was in mourning. I was sad, my inner teenager was having issues with everything... My feet were stomping and I wasn't having any of it. Although I was subconsciously working my way back with joining this round writing goals and starting to prepare.

Until today, Friday 19th May 2013, I have given myself a giant kick in the butt, I have said that's fine, I allowed myself to mourn my weight the 17.5kg that I have lost so far (though really Why? I am is still confusing) and I am Committing, to myself to you and to my family:

 

My Commitment is to get to through the finish line!
I am committing to myself and to you that I am finishing my race first, I am going to loose my final 10kg;
I am going to get up early and do my workouts;
I am going to Try 1 new sport every month;
I am going to smash week to week with my Cal's;
I am going to enjoy this journey and not doubt myself;
I am going to grow as a person with all that I am learning and have learnt;
I am going to be able to run 10km at the end of the 2 round without stopping;
I am a determined and healthy woman; I can do this for me and for my kids and hubby and for the rest of my life;
I am going to prove to myself that I can!
And when I do I am going to skydive for the first time to celebrate and say that I did!!! OMG...

 

Let the games begin :)

 

 

Over thinking... 
 
I have discovered something about myself and I thought I should share :)
I have decided I am in Weight Loss denial, topped with a sprinkling of over active imagination =

Walking into the Supermarket with Mike and 2 people I know rater well just walked straight past me. Now this has been going on for a few weeks so already my mind was working over time hence the over active imagination,  But this time was different because I had a witness :)


So I poked Mike in the ribs and said did you see that. Hmmm (male response) and kept walking. 2 Isles later and all healthy food in my basket  lol and It happens again, this time the person in question is looking at me then quickly away....


See See See I am whispering loudly to him; When he turns and laughs at me almost to the point of tears. Leigh they are not ignoring you they don't recognise you!  

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh.


Well that's different, so I walk up to the said lady and have a lovely chat about how she was checking out my hubby and couldn't pick where she new me from.

Moral of the story, Enjoy the experience don't over think it. And I might just have to add in a shopping spree too !!

Here we go... Again :)

Where to start???
Hi my name is Leigh Stuart and I am proud to say I completed Michelle Bridges 12wbt Round 1 2012...
I lost 16.5kg from preseason until the end and completed most of my goals.

2 weeks ago the round was due to finish and so I started to slacken, Wondering if I should do it again, really not 100% sure either way. 1 week to go and hmmm leaning more toward not doing it again money wise, start eating more snacks etc. 3 days remaining and I am battling with myself eating more snacks and only doing 5 days of fittness not 6 ETC......

5 days later and I am back lol and it feels better, security??? probably....

Why I think its because I need to enjoy this round, to go again over the things I have learnt and pick up the things I missed oh and to keep trying and keep on track.

I new I could do it last time because after 22 years I gave up smoking. On the 28th of June 2012 I can proudly say I have been given up for 1 whole year so I new I could do this too.

I haven't fallen off the wagon and I haven't given in or up but I know I wasn't yet as strong as I want to be...
But I also know I will get there 1 day at a time because I can...

I just need to find out where the new me fits into my old life :)